Monday, May 12, 2008
Just another self-absorbed boomer
Hagibis - the Filipino word for being rapid or swift. When I got this machine last Saturday, that is what the missus called the whole affair. The machine gave me a good enjoyable ride, it was swift yet smooth. However, the process of buying this machine revealed certain things about me. I am not so sure if what I have found is something I am happy about, I got the word "idolatry" spinning in my brain. The whole process showed things that went inside my heart, what went on inside me.
For starters, it confirmed to me that I am a self absorbed baby-boomer, I am still intent on re-living or realizing some old teen-age dreams. What's up with us baby-boomers, why are we like that? They say what separates men from boys is the cost of their toys.
After taking this bike home, I sat down that night to reflect on what has just happened. What kind of example have I just given my kids? I felt so ashamed of this. How could I do this when I know there are folk around the world, my neighbor, who do not even have something to eat. I just insulted them. The brat is still alive and well and as I grow older, it reveals itself to me, and I wish it would die. Yesterday, I felt like returning the bike to the dealer. If I was not locked in legally, I would have asked them to take it back; of course, they would not return my deposit. Boomers are into symbols - this one is now a symbol of my shame. I was mumbling - I am so sorry, God, forgive me. How could I be like that? I am so sorry for my example, deeply sorry. Lord, have mercy on me.